Turning Two

During my writer’s block I neglected to document a lot of important things worth remembering. At the top of the list was Will turning 2! As the second child we didn’t make a large production or really even have a party, but I think he enjoyed himself nonetheless. We celebrated by going to the zoo to see the animals, ate Bucky Badger cake and rode on his new tricycle. Up until now when Ella rode her bike, he always had to be pulled behind in the wagon. His first ride was so amazing and he really enjoyed his new found freedom. As Ella rode ahead of him he yelled, “wait for me Ella, I coming too!”

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I cannot believe he is already 2 and yet he is so mature for his age, that it seems like he could be older. With our only parenting knowledge coming from our experiences with Ella, he has definitely offered a different perspective. They are a lot alike, but he’s his own kid too. Unlike Ella, he is a rational 2 year old who, for the most part, listens. Last week he didn’t take a nap at daycare so they forewarned me that our night might be a bit rough. When we got home to eat dinner, he wasn’t cooperating. Typically when that happens I threaten bedtime and it always works to get him to sit down. That night though when I made my threat he responded with, “yeah, I tired.” So I took him upstairs, laid him down and he went to sleep an hour early. That would never happen with Ella, even to this day. On the other hand, he’s way more sensitive than she ever will be. If you look at him wrong or even think about telling him no, his lower lip sticks out, he huffs & he puffs and throws himself to the ground crying.

He’s super smart & has an impressive vocabulary. He’s extremely independent, always insisting that, “Will do!” everything on his own. From, “going to the garbage” to putting on his own shoes, he has to do everything by himself. He loves ALL big vehicles & shouts every time we see one -semis, dump trucks, garbage trucks, excavators. He loves motorcycles, Bucky Badger (obviously) and dinosaurs and loves to eat all fruit, ice cream, cupcakes, noodles, pancakes, muffins and pizza.

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School S_ _ _S

As August comes to a close I finally realize that we need to mentally prepare ourselves for school. Yes, that’s right – one week from today Ella will start school. Today we met her kindergarten teacher and went through what to expect for our first day. I guess I thought it wouldn’t be a big deal since we’ve been dropping her off at daycare since she was 6 weeks old. Nothing changes, right? Wrong!

Ella has been pumped for this new adventure. She is excited to make new friends and really excited that there is no more nap time. However, after we left her new classroom this morning she asked me why the play areas were so small and there weren’t many toys. Even though we go to a curriculum-based daycare full of tons of opportunities, I had to explain that school is all about learning and that there would be far less time to play.

ellaShe wasn’t thrilled with my answer and I think it’s safe to say her level of enthusiasm diminished a bit, which is not great. You see – school is either going to fall into the S U C K S or S A V E S category and I was really banking on the latter. At this point, those three tiny letters hold the only hope we have for sanity.

Once again, we’ve ran into behavioral issues (I’m currently reading: Raising Your Spirited Child) at daycare and that typically means she’s bored or not challenged and is ready for something new. We have tried almost every parenting tactic and employed negotiation skills that even the best salesperson would be envious of and …nothing! Seriously. Not a single thing works on this kid. There is no reward system, positive reinforcement or threat that has an impact.

I’m hoping that her new school setting will SAVE us and provide a lot of things, really. I’d love a classroom full of kids where just one might have a larger personality than her. It would be good for her to not always be the ring leader and at the same time it would be nice for her to befriend someone with as much energy & enthusiasm as her. I hope that learning to read & write, amongst a ton of other new opportunities, will challenge her and keep her attention focused. My last request is a selfish one – I hope public school allows us to meet more parents like us. Not only would it be nice to meet some parents in our age bracket, but we’d also love to know more that share our parenting style. Very simply said, we don’t coddle our kids. If they fall, we expect them to get up. We don’t talk to them like they’re babies and helicopter moms would gasp at my lack of sensitivity. Don’t get me wrong – I am not judging other parents and their styles, but instead simply stating that it would be nice to know we’re not alone.

While I’m unsure if my wishes will come true, one thing I can guarantee – school will change our lives! Drop-off, pick-up, vacations, daily routines, free time, etc. Those things aren’t a big deal and I’m confident that we can adjust, but my bigger concern is that school will inevitably change Ella. Right now, even though she acts like she’s 15, she still thinks I’m super cool and wants to hang out with me. It’s only a matter of time before she thinks I’m lame and will opt out of our girl time to hang with her friends. She’s also been in the same, safe, monitored, controlled environment her whole life. This will be her first exposure to the big, imperfect world in which we live. This is where we enter the very real possibility of bullying, especially considering her cleft.

It’s true that she challenges me daily and while I want her to behave, I never want her to change. Her large, confident personality is a part of what makes her so special & I will do my damnedest to protect her from possible insecurities that can so easily creep in. For now I can only hope that we have instilled enough strength & bravery to allow her to take on this new adventure and if possible, come out an even stronger kid. Wish us luck and happy school year!

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Will Weekend

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This weekend Joe’s cousin Luke married his longtime girlfriend Miranda at the Enchanted Barn. Obviously I wanted to be there, but as I wrote last – I started a new job two weeks ago and spent the majority of last week traveling. So when the weekend rolled around the last thing I wanted to do was to get back in a car for another 10+ hours. Joe & Ella decided that they would make the trip alone and Will & I would stay behind. I was sad to miss the event, but it also offered me the chance to spend some rare one-on-one time with Will.

He’ll turn 2 in a month and I’m pretty sure rare doesn’t accurately describe our time, since it’s probably the first time he and I have ever been able to do something just the two of us. We’re always together but it’s usually with Ella and he never gets 100% of my attention.

We had such a great time! We spent the morning at the pool with our friends Theresa & Bex. We thought we were crazy to go since it was pretty cloudy all morning long but as soon as we arrived at the pool, the clouds parted and the day was packed with sunshine. I later learned that we should likely thank Ella for our good fortune, as she asked Mother Nature for some sunshine at that exact same time.

We played with squirt guns, practiced counting while jumping into the pool and ate our weight in snacks from concessions. After a long nap, we then headed to our friends Emmy & Seth’s for dinner and drinks. The sangria was almost as good as the company and Will loved playing with their visiting golden retriever, Barney. We came home late and snuggled until we both fell asleep!

When we decided we wanted a second child, I told myself I would never let Ella feel like she was being replaced by a new, younger model. I have been adamant about ensuring she and I get our “girl time”  but I have neglected to make sure Will gets the same treatment. After our enjoyable weekend, I have decided that from now on I will make sure to set aside some one-on-one time with Will too.
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P.S. Ella & Joe had a great time too!

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May…be I Should Write

It’s already May and since I missed all of April, I should probably write! There’s plenty of material so now it’s just deciding what’s most worthy.

This past weekend we were fortunate enough to participate in our third March of Dimes: March for Babies on behalf of The Cleft Awareness Foundation. In years past the weather has been awful, but this year Mother Nature graced us with some rare sunshine making the day absolutely beautiful. Through the support and generosity of our friends & family we were able to raise $2,000 and we had 18 walkers on our team! We look forward to this event for years to come.

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The walk always falls on Mother’s Day weekend, which in the past, has always seemed really inconvenient. Of course I’d like to be able to spend that day with my mom & grandma and this event prevents me from doing that. It wasn’t until this year that I finally realized just how perfect the timing actually is. If it weren’t for Ella, I might not even be a mom at this point in my life and we’d definitely not be participating in the March of Dimes walk. In fact there are a lot of things that wouldn’t exist if there were no Ella!

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Adventure’s

Will – Will has experienced a couple of “firsts” in the last month and loved them both. We took him to his first Badger basketball game and he was thrilled with every second. He cheered the entire time and pointed out Bucky whenever we spotted him! We also took him to the circus and he loved all the bright lights & music, but was jealous of Ella riding the camel.

8211_10100661404003466_1433647811_nEveryone knows that Will is a smiley, happy man – but I feel like I have neglected to mention that he is also sensitive, has a terrible temper and HATES to be told no. Actually, you don’t even have to verbalize the word no – just think it in your head and he’s upset. You can say something like, “hey buddy, let’s not do that” as he’s throwing & breaking things and he reacts by hanging his head, sticking his lip out and throwing himself to the ground.

Some of it may be due to the fact that he’s basically had an ear infection since last October. You’re probably thinking we’re terrible parents but I have taken him in plenty of times. Unfortunately all of the meds they try to treat it with, just don’t work. The poor guy just had to keep enduring infection after infection before we were finally able to be referred to an ENT to discuss tube surgery. We have that appointment this week and while I don’t want to go through yet another surgery, this one is a breeze (in our books) and it will make him so much happier & healthier in the long run. Bring on the tubes!

Ella – Joe & I both grew up with team sports playing a huge role in our lives. We want our kids to experience the same thing so we signed Ella up for soccer! Our small towns didn’t offer soccer as an option so neither of us have played but jumped on the opportunity for her to meet new kids and run some of that energy off! She’s only had three practices, but seems to love it so far.

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I don’t know how it’s possible, but I also registered her for kindergarten in the fall. It’s crazy to think that she is 5 years old already! She is so clever & funny that I wish I could just keep her exactly as she is forever. Yesterday we played a memory game where each person takes a turn laying a card with one word on it, with the goal of crafting a story. With each card laid the story adds up.

I have always said that she has a fantastic memory but this game is a perfect example. The level of detail she has in everything she does is impressive. As the cards spread across our entire dining table, I was beginning to wonder how she would be able to remember all of the details and was trying to wrap it up. As I drew the next card with a clock on it I said, “then the clock struck 9:00 p.m.” Her face quickly grimaced and she said, “awww man, that’s bedtime!” She then drew her next card which was a hammer. As she laid it down and told her story I almost died at just how smart she is! Ella’s story:

Once upon a time there was a “owl” who lived in the woods when a “fish” swam by. It started to rain so he grabbed an “umbrella” and tied a “bow” on top. The bow belonged to a “teddy bear” who wanted to go on a “boat ride.” On the boat there was a “bike” and on the bike there was a “violin” with an “apple” stuck to the very top. They got hungry so they ate some delicious “pizza” but it was cold outside so they had to put their “socks” on. Then an “astronaut” came by so they watched the man putting the flag on the moon. Then the “clock” struck 9:00 p.m. ….so the bear grabbed the “hammer” and smashed the clock to pieces so they could go on their next adventure!

Speaking of adventures… This winter has been painful to say the least and with more negative temps upon us, there seems to be no end in sight! Obviously the only solution is to pack up and head towards warmer land, so next week we’re traveling to Jamaica! Our life is so busy that I haven’t even had time to get excited but I know it’s going to be a blast. At this point almost anything would be a welcomed change.

We spent a week in Costa Rica last year for our honeymoon, which was a bit too long to be away from the kiddo’s so we’ll be going for 4 nights/5 days.

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